Tag Archives: agile humor
New Agile Jobs
Code-Alones – Programmers who lack the people skills to be developers.
None-Of-Your-Business Analysts – Requirements gatherers for skunkworks projects.
Projectile Managers – Representatives of death march projects who must appear before angry stakeholders in the Marketing Conference Room.
Agile Humor – More Words to Live By
Buristic Review – An exercise to gain heuristic insight that will be rejected by a bureaucrat because the research didn’t come from his team.
Merital Raise – A merit-based pay increase for spending more time in the office cranking out code with your colleagues than at home with your spouse.
Read more on Agile Humor – More Words to Live By…
Agile Humor – New Certifications
The brilliant Peter Saddington, a/k/a AgileScout, posted a wickedly funny April 1st announcement of a Certified Agile Blogger course. Yep, April Fool! Read it, it’s great fun.
Since I blog about Agile from the point of view of the business stakeholders, it got me thinking about other certifications we could use in the Agile community.
Read more on Agile Humor – New Certifications…
Agile Humor – The Definition Of Done
The CMO: When the new functionality reduces the bounce rate from 40% to 4%.
The CIO: Done? When’s the release, 11:45? 11:46.
The PR Director: 11:45? I told ClickZ and TechCrunch it went live last Tuesday.
Read more on Agile Humor – The Definition Of Done…
Posted in Agile Humor
Tagged agile, agile humor, agile jokes, code release, Definition of done, scrum
Leave a comment
Agile Humor – Top Ten Rejected Agile Taglines
1. Accelerate Success But Let’s Not Get Crazy About It
2. Aggression In Its Most Passive Form
3. Delivering Your Lame-Ass Ideas Faster Every Day
4. We’re Not Arrogant – We’re Winning
Read more on Agile Humor – Top Ten Rejected Agile Taglines…
Agile Humor – Yo Momma’s So Agile…
Yo momma’s so Agile she took a two-day vacation and came back a Certified Momma.
Yo momma’s so Agile she makes you eat breakfast in fifteen minutes, standing up.
Yo momma’s so Agile she’ll only commit to PTA four weeks at a time.
Read more on Agile Humor – Yo Momma’s So Agile……
Agile Humor – Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?
THE BUSINESS ANALYST
I have twelve meetings today, I don’t have time to get into the whole user story. But I can tell you it involves a rooster on a distributed team.
Read more on Agile Humor – Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?…
Posted in Agile Humor
Tagged agile, agile humor, agile jokes, backlog, business owner, chicken cross the road
1 Comment
Agile Humor – Words To Live By
Agilewashing – A waterfall shop that throws a scrum or two onto their schedule to seem cool. The Agile equivalent of a veneer, also known as “all hat, no cattle”.
Agillectomy – Removal of a development team’s efficiency gland by the new waterfall-loving CTO.
Read more on Agile Humor – Words To Live By…
Posted in Agile Humor
Tagged agile, agile humor, agile jokes, Agilewashing, Agillectomy, development, Documutation, Heuristic Evaluation, Hubristic Evaluation, kanban, scrum, Scrum of the Earth
1 Comment
Agile Humor: What Do You Stand For?
Any
Girls
Into
Living
Extreme?
How
Odd.
Tested
Fine.
Iterating…
(Xhausted…)
Kill
All
Negativity;
Board
Advances
Nirvana.
Stand-up
Convergence
Requirement:
Up
Mornings.
Posted in Agile Humor
Tagged agile, agile humor, agile jokes, Hotfix, humor, Joke, kanban, scrum
1 Comment
Agile Humor: “Overheard” – An Agile Crossword
Posted in Agile Humor
Tagged agile, agile humor, agile jokes, analyst, code complete, cowboy code, crossword, debug, humor, jokes, kanban, lean, manifesto, offshore, puzzle, red bull, release, scope, scrum, sprint, waterfall
Leave a comment
