A Marketer’s Guide To Agile Development – Survey Says…

The customer base was shrinking, revenues were falling. Sales reps feared their product was losing relevance in the marketplace. Company executives reassured them it wasn’t true, market research indicated product usage was steady, even increasing in some areas!

But the research was wrong. The decline was real, and permanent. Why such a huge disconnect between the market research results and reality?

They surveyed consumers with publicly listed landlines,  at home during weekdays, with the time and willingness to take a long survey. This method had been used for decades, and could be reliably extrapolated over the general population. But the world had changed.  Those folks now skewed older, and were not a representative sample of the marketplace.

In the case above, the product was phone books. Older consumers were still using them at the same rate. But younger consumers weren’t – and were also less likely to have landlines, publicly list their phone numbers, spend weekdays at home, and agree to take a long survey. That’s why the surveys (which were otherwise conducted with scientifically accepted methodology) let the executives keep believing they didn’t have a problem. They told their sales reps to defend the product by explaining to prospects that their perception about product relevance was wrong – they had the surveys to prove it. That did not turn out well.

When the real world indicators don’t look anything like the marketing research, defending the research is usually NOT a winning strategy. Unearth the worrying trends and inconvenient truths about your products. Then develop a roadmap to deal with them.

A Marketer’s Guide to Agile a Development – Who Said It:

When it comes to meetings, meanings of common phrases differ depending who’s talking;

“So that’s the problem in a nutshell. Thoughts?”

– “I’d like to hear your opinion on how I might approach the solution.”

– “I want you to solve this for me, but I don’t want to ask you outright.”

– “I got nothing. Any ideas? Pleeeeze?”

– “Tag – You’re It!”

“Let’s circle back on this later.”

– “There are more pressing priorities, so we’ll revisit this topic at another time.”

– “We aren’t making any progress here – and I need a Red a Bull really bad right now.”

– “You’re clearly delusional. We’ll talk about this once you re-enter earth’s atmosphere.”

– “If you don’t stop talking, I’m going to gouge my eyes out with this pen.”

“That’s a great question.”

– “Good question.”

– “Stupid question.”

– “Phew – I know the answer to this one.”

– “Crap – I got nothing.”

A Marketer’s Guide to Agile Development – You Can’t Make Me

I fly US Airways a lot. Not road-warrior status, but several thousand miles per month.

In the many years I’ve flown US Airways, my assigned boarding zone has varied. You know, sometimes you win (Zone 1 or 2), sometimes you lose (Zone 4 or 5). But something’s changed – in the last few months, I’ve been consistently assigned Zone 4 or 5 for boarding. Understand, it’s not just drawing the short straw occasionally – it’s become a running joke among my travel colleagues – “Bye Cathy, see you in [insert city here]”.

Lately I’ve eschewed wheeled luggage for soft duffel bags that fit under the seat. As any traveler knows, Zone 4 or 5 equals no overhead bin space. As in, “sorry, we’re gonna have to go ahead and gate-check that bag for ya, ma’am.”

I am loyal to the airline. I’m frequently assigned TSA Pre-Check status. My ticket fares are almost never in the aggregator bargain-basement tier. They have every reason to like me. So why is this happening?

I have a theory – I’ve never signed up for their credit card.

I suspect my consumer and behavioral profile fits US Airways’ propensity model of customers who should. One of the perks of a US Airways credit card holders is – wait for it – Zone 2 boarding for all flights. My hypothesis is that the inconvenient boarding zone assignments are being used as a prod. They’re to nudge me into signing up for their credit card so I can start carrying a wheeled bag again. Too Machiavellian, you say? Perhaps. But that’s my theory.

I’m so onto you, US Airways. You are the masters of segmentation. But I don’t care how many times you assign me to Boarding Zone Siberia. You can’t make me get your credit card. I can hold out. Two words. Travel knits.

Update 4/18/14: The siege is over – got Zone 2!!

Update 6/18/14: No, it’s not over – oh, alright, I’m getting the damn card. You win.

Agile Humor – Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road? – Ad Agency Edition

Data Analytics

Cell 1 [Side of the Road A] Attrition = -1
Cell 2 [Side of the Road B] Acquisition = +1
Net Gain = 0
Key Drivers; Insufficient Sample Size, More Data Needed

Creative

She didn’t. Chicken concept didn’t fly – focus group liked the puppy.

Digital

The Side Of The Road A landing page needs to be retooled to improve engagement.

Client Services

No puppy. The client chose the chicken concept. Actually they asked if it could be a rooster.

Client Services

Can the rooster be black? With red tail feathers?

Client Services

No roosters. We need to bring back the chicken. Their CMO was once bitten by a rooster.

Accounting

Tell the chicken to code the time spent road crossing to Account CHIXCROSS438.

Client Services

The client’s just signed on a new CMO. She liked the puppy.

Agile Humor – And Even More Agile Drinks

“Lean In” Mule

Vodka, ginger beer, and lime juice, made between 11:15 pm and 6:30 am because that’s the only time you’re not at work.

Unrealistic Mojito

Macerate 6 mint leaves in a simple syrup of tubinado sugar and water, add a shot of Cuban rum, juice one lime into…geez, this is taking way longer than the estimate, we’ll have to carry it in the next sprint.

Intern Screwdriver

Skittles-infused vodka, orange juice, and a pile of swizzle sticks to organize by length and color.

A Marketer’s Guide to Agile Development – A Tale of Two Christmas List Apps

Last year I downloaded an app to help me keep track of my Christmas shopping. I paid the small fee for extra functionality and no ads. It did all the things it said it would do. But it annoyed the crap out of me every day I used it.

This year I downloaded a different app to accomplish the same task. The design is clunky and uses gaudy colors. It’s done up in some kitschy font – looks like Comic Sans on a bender. It also does all the things it said it would do. And I like it much better.

Why? Both apps track budgets, recipients, gifts and costs. But here’s the difference. This year’s app lets me think like a Christmas shopper, while last year’s app forced me to think like a DBA.

Let’s say I bought my nephew Alex a Tom Brady jersey for $48.

Last Year’s App:

Step 1: Click to the Recipient area
Step 2: Enter my nephew Alex’s name.
Step 3: Click “Save”.
Step 4: Click to the Gift area.
Step 5: Enter “Tom Brady Jersey” in the Gift field and $48 in the Price field.
Step 6: Click “Save”.
Step 7: Click back to the Recipient area
Step 8: Find Alex in the Name drop-down.
Step 9: Find “Tom Brady Jersey” in the Gift drop-down.
Step 10: Click “Save”.

I had to repeat these steps for every recipient, and almost every gift. It did have a feature where I could choose multiple recipients for the same gift. Useful if I was giving all my nephews the same Patriots jersey – which I wasn’t. So using it got pretty old, pretty quick.

This Year’s App:

Step 1: Click to the New List area.
Step 2: Enter Alex’s name.
Step 3: Enter “Tom Brady Jersey” in the Gift field.
Step 4: Enter $48 in the Price field.
Step 5: Click “Save”.

And we’re done. It probably creates the same tables as the other app. But it lets me enter the data using a shopper’s thought process instead of a programmer’s. So it’s a keeper. I guess now I have to pay $1.99 so I don’t get an ad every 30 seconds begging me to play Candy Crush.

Agile Humor – Ten Things Heard at Every Thanksgiving Dinner

10. “Just pile your coats on the bed.”

9. “Let’s eat – oh wait, we should say grace.”

8. “Who wants to say grace?”

7. “Somebody took my fork.”

6. “Oh no, are the rolls still in the oven?”

5. “Five hours cooking, and the meal’s over in twenty minutes.”

4. “I cannot possibly eat another thing.”

3. (Same person, 5 minutes later) “Just a sliver.”

2. “Nobody ate the green salad.”

1. “I’m just gonna let that pan soak.”

A Marketer’s Guide to Agile Development – UX: Don’t Try This At Home

Calling one segment “A” and the other “B” doesn’t make it an A/B test.

You are not a representative sample. You have skin in the game and you know too much.

Your typical user is not a programmer. Don’t force him or her to think like one.

Designers rule at Apple. Programmers rule at Microsoft. One created the iPod. The other created the Zune. UX matters.

If you can’t find the relevant copy on the site, it doesn’t matter how cool the font is.

Agile Humor – Still More Definitions

Testing Phase – Period that elapses from a cheery “Sure we can make that change” to a sign on the back of your chair that says “ADD IT TO PHASE 2”.

Aggressive Deliverable – You’ll get there with some hard work, a little luck, and seven or eight cases of Five-Hour Energy Drink under your desk.

Stretch Goal – It’s definitely achievable. So’s the Triple Crown. You’ll actually see that portion of your bonus about as often.

Just a Small Tweak – It’s not like you have to boil the ocean or anything – just Boston Harbor and Puget Sound.

In Scope – It’s something new we want in the software. And you’re writing software. So it’s all the in the scope of – you know, software. Plus, it’s nothing major, really just a small tweak.

Marketing Meets IT